Appalled: to fill or overcome with horror, consternation, or fear; dismay:
The raging dragon reached the Kaempern travelers before the horse and rider could, but Ian witnessed the terror. He heard the screams. Fire rose from the earth like an inferno ignited by a match from hell.
The dragon had spit his wrath and flew into the sky, hovering like a vulture. Waiting to strike again.
When Ian finally reached the blackened earth, pain pierced through his being like a sword, his stomach turned sour from the stench of burnt flesh. The dragon had spit his wrath and flew into the sky, hovering like a vulture. Waiting to strike again.
Stunned, he dismounted. Men, women, and children lay scorched on the ground, some crawled, others lay still, others walked in circles, confused.
"No!" he cried. "No." For a moment his mind fogged, his body froze.
Through his tears, he saw people walking in the distance. He struggled to regain his senses. If he didn’t come out of shock and act before the dragon struck again more people would die. He had to bridle the anger and pain.
“The shield,” Ian tried to holler, but his voice cracked. “The shield.” This time he could hear himself, but no one responded. He mounted Sparkles and searched desperately for the Dragon Shield. Within moments he found it lying upside down, abandoned on the ground. His feet trembled when he dismounted again. With shaking hands he grabbed the wooden targe and glanced at the sky.
The dragon hovered overhead; its shadow blocked the sun, stirring a cold wind that blew ash and sparks across the prairie.
I can totally feel is devastation. Very well written.
ReplyDeleteThank you Kelly.
ReplyDeleteIf anyone would like to read more of this scene, you can view it here.
http://dragontargeseries.blogspot.com/2011/11/ophidian-de-ahrimann.html
This is the first post from the blogfest I have read today, and already, I am highly impressed! The emotion jumps off the page. I love this line: "Fire rose from the earth like an inferno ignited by a match from hell." - Beautifully written!
ReplyDeleteHoly. Crap. This was amazing. You write with such grace. It seems effortless. I want to be ont of the first people to buy this! Again - A.M.A.Z.I.N.G!
ReplyDeleteThis is an interesting scene. The senses are touched as I often like to do in my own writing. I am left wondering what an item like the Dragon Shield is capable of when it is merely a wooden targe. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteThe link I posted will introduce you to the magic of the shield, if you are interest.
DeleteThat's so sad! Great job!
ReplyDeleteSuch tension and sadness. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI want to read this book! You've written this so so so well, still feeling the intensity here. Wow!
ReplyDeleteWell-crafted. This scene moved me.
ReplyDeleteA to Z Challenge April 2012
Twitter: @AprilA2Z
#atozchallenge
Fills me with dread and reminds me of how I feel when playing Skyrim and a dragon swoops down on me from above. It's always pretty scary, especially with the sound turned up.
ReplyDeleteAppalled is a perfect description! This is beautifully written Dianne :) Wonderful emotional description. Fabulous job!
ReplyDeleteThank you!
ReplyDeleteI love dragons, and this is why. They cause such utter devastation, and you captured it very well.
ReplyDeleteYou also portrayed Ian's feelings brilliantly. I don't think you'd straight away be a hero in a situation like this, it would take a moment to process what went on and that you need to act.
Really excellent stuff.
That was really powerful. I enjoyed it. Ians reaction is dead on.
ReplyDeleteMan. I cringed when I read the stuff about burning flesh. Blah! Very well written! I felt like I was Ian in those 250 words!
ReplyDeleteNice! So powerful. And Dragons!! Love it.
ReplyDelete*big grin* I love dragons ^_^ I think you got the emotion spot on too.
ReplyDeleteCompletely appalling! That means you did a wonderful job.
ReplyDeleteOh man - this is beautiful. Powerful, and yes... appalling. Great job.
ReplyDeleteVery powerful and beautiful piece of writing. This si the sort of fantasy that makes me want to come back for more!
ReplyDeleteAwesome! Such vivid imagery and emotion. Ian is truly heroic. OK you've hooked me into the story.
ReplyDelete........dhole
Exciting. . .appalling. . . I want to read more! :)
ReplyDelete~Elizabeth